Monday randoms

One: Proof of Marriage! Two: A happy reunion :) Three: A taste of Vanuatu.

Notes:

Secret Diary of a Call Girl. This is a strangely addictive show, despite the fact that it stars Billie Piper (what were her big hit again?) I've just finished season 2, with season 3 waiting in the wings. I mean its about an "escort" (which we all know is a polite way of saying high class hooker), so maybe that's the appeal. Not to say that prostitution is appealing to me in any way. Not exactly. But i always walked the risky line right?

Work. WHAT is it good for? Meh, fine, it funds my life. Except that i really, really wanna be back on holidays, and I'm desperately trying to scheme a way to have some more time off. The fact that i have no annual leave left WILL NOT DETER ME!

We have movie vouchers that need to be used up in the next four days, and there are literally no movies that i want to see, which is a first. Actually none. It's so bad I'd consider Rango. What a disappointment.

My 'books-to-read' have dwindled down to a mere TEN! The hugest of achievements. I mean the shelf is looking almost bare, which is thrilling. On the clothes front, for various reasons I'm trying to buy very little, but the fact was i needed new pants. So i picked up two pairs over the weekend. But i will not buy boots this winter. I will not.

Mr and Mrs

I'm back! And I'm married! And tanned!



We actually got back on Thursday night, but i promptly got sick (I'm sure the plane was contaminated), and spent most of Friday on the couch watching 2 seasons of Secret Diary of a Call Girl. (In other words, life is back to normal.)



The rest of the weekend has been a whirlwind of washing clothes, grocery shopping, and moaning about being back in Sydney. Back to work on Monday, BOO. Reality has, alas, reared its ugly head. But we're off to see Maria and Peter and Jack tonight, which will cheer me up immensely. The Pest claims to have missed me, but i won't believe it till i see it.



There is obviously a lot to talk about, but this will have to be done in stages. For now, let me just say that our wedding day was, in a word, amazing. Its a total cliche, but it really was the best day of my life. I can't even believe how perfectly the day went, and what a fantastic party we had. Everyone had such a good time, and i honestly wouldn't have changed a thing. Of course, none of this would have been possible without all the help we got from our family and friends, some of whom travelled great distances to be with us. I'm not going to thank everyone individually here, but i WILL just say two things - firstly, my parents are really and truly the best people on the planet, who literally gave us the most beautiful day, and respected everything we wanted, and partied all night with us on the dance floor. Thank you so much - i will never forget how much you've done for us, and because of you our wedding day exceeded all of our expectations.




Secondly, our bridal party was made up of the most wonderful people, who mean the world to us - it was a big bridal party, but i think that's just testament to how lucky we are to have so many amazing friends and family, who are always there for us, and who did so much to make our day special, let alone possible! Some of my best memories of the day will always be dancing the night away with you guys - so thank you.




I've seen SOME photos from our fantastic photographer, but i haven't got them in my hot little hands yet, so i will save the wedding post until i do - though i can't wait to share the photos, because from what I've seen, they are A-MA-ZING! And of course, you'll be wanting to hear all about our honeymoon, right? That'll be coming up too, once we sort through the 800+ photos we took. (I know, we're freaks.) Ten sunny Vanuatu days of cocktails, seafood, swimming...WHY DID WE HAVE TO COME HOME???




SO! Plenty to tell, and I'll get to it soon, i hope. In the meantime, don't think that just because the wedding is over, we'll be able to relax and take it easy. That's just not us. We have a move coming up (more on that later), several visitors to look forward to, two weddings, birthday parties, and a mini-break or two...and of course we're always looking towards our next big adventure, which (scarily! excitingly!) will probably be here before you know it. But again. That's a discussion for another time.




As a last note, i will say that married life gets a big tick from me. (OK. It's really no different to living-together life. And actually, we've only been back from our holiday for three days, so who can really say. But, you know. It's nice to make it honest and all.) Pics coming soon!

Gooooooing to the chapel and we're....

......goooooonna get maaaaaaaarried....

Yesiree. I am now pretty much a day away from the big day. Which actually i can't believe, given how long we've been talking about it. Ca-razy. I was actually deluded enough to think that everything would be done by this week, and I'd be able to relax and enjoy the build up....um yeah. No. Didn't happen. This has to have been one of the most stressful weeks of my life. I've been running around like a madwoman. Sleep? What's that again? My mind's been going a million miles an hour trying to keep track of everything and everyone.

But. Today i tried on my finished wedding dress, and it was all worth it. I actually felt excited, genuinely excited, for the first time. I mean when you're dressed like a bride, you really feel like a bride right? We had our rehearsal tonight, which was fun...(read: nerve-racking). I know I'm kinda the bubbly type, which most people take to mean confident in all situations, but really, I'm a little nervous about the church bit. All eyes are on you, so you really better hope you don't drop the ring, or stuff your lines up, or faint. All of these possibilities are giving me nightmares, but i think it's too late to back out now ;) (Did we consider eloping, Jo? Why did we scratch that idea again?)

Despite that bit, I'm REALLY looking forward to - marrying Jo, obviously - but also, the party afterwards! Woot! Dancing the night away with our family and friends really is the fun part.

Even though this week has been a bit of a stress, I've had a great couple of weeks leading up to this - a Hunter Valley hens weekend, high tea and cocktails, a rehearsal dinner tonight, and a last hurrah with some good friends after work last week. And it really was quite the hurrah, let me tell you. We started our night at one of Sydney's best kept secrets - the Shady Pines. You'd never find it if you didn't know where it was - which is in a back alley, in a decrepit-looking building without a sign - but once you walk in, you may as well be back in the Wild West. It's got a real Saloon feel - in an awesome way, not in a cheesy Gold Coast Movie World way - plus, you get free peanuts all night! And the drinks - delicious. Tequila is their specialty, but personally i enjoy the vodka and fresh juices.

Kat and I and some sort of enormous drink.

So, Shady Pines, closely followed by everyones favourite Japanese pastime, Karaoke. Because honestly, there's nothing like belting out the classics with a bunch of your pissed friends. It was completely fantastic, obviously, with highlights including a very heartfelt rendition of Wonderwall by Oasis, a cracking Sweet Child of Mine by the Gunnies, and of course our personal favourite, Living on a Prayer by the great Bon Jovi. Lauren and I took advantage of Turnsie's drunken state by knocking him to the ground whenever we could (and knocking him back down again every time he tried to get up. We're pretty awesome friends like that.) We had a great night, even if i couldn't talk the whole of the next day.




I really do have the best bunch of friends, including these two crazies. We call ourselves instigators, because THAT is what we do. (What? That's a really cool name.)

Turnsie, me, Lauren

I've been able to spend some time this week with some great people i haven't seen in ages, like our adorable flower girl, Jo's niece Lauren...

And of course his cousin and one of my awesome bridesmaids, Christina. We always have way too much fun together, and i hope she'll forgive me for ditching her for an hour to write this post...(anyway, foxtel's there. it's everyones friend.)

So this is it from me! I won't be back in touch till we get back from our honeymoon in Vanuatu, and when i return it shall be as a married woman! I know I've said it before, but it's really nice (after all the talking and planning and fighting) to know that it's all for the sake of marrying Jo, who i love beyond words, and can't wait to call my husband.




Wish us luck!

I'm a teeny tiny bit busy...

...but I'm still taking the time to write. Because it clears my head and i hope in years to come i can look back and remember all the stuff i used to do when i was young and free and unmarried... *winks*




This post is going to be all over the place. As always, we've been supremely busy - and not just with wedding stuff. I'm not one to let my social life suffer for anything. There's been lots of fun in the air, despite the stress of organising a wedding. For example, Valentines Day. We're not usually Valentines Day people, because it's a bloody huge rip off if you ask me. Flowers magically triple in price, and most people i know agree that you don't need one set day in the year to show your someone special that you love them. All the same, Jo was a doll and got us tickets to see Breakfast at Tiffany's at the Orpheum, my most favourite cinema in Sydney, and it was quite a lovely evening. We rushed home for eggs on toast (romantic dinner, no?) and then hightailed it to the Orpheum for some champagne before the movie. Inside, it looks like this:








So you can see why i love it. And of course, Audrey Hepburn has a face that deserves to be watched on the big screen.




Then, of course, there's all the children in my life. It's a rather convenient thing, (when you love kids but really aren't in the mood to pop any of your own out), to have family that so obligingly provide wonderful children at your disposal whenever you please. There's my little superheros, for a start, who constantly make me laugh with their honesty.

Jack has been reunited with his old friend Lilo (known to the rest of us as Leah, Maid of Honour extraordinaire), back from the UK for the wedding. Maria asked him the other day if he was ready to marry me soon. "No", he said, but he'd be happy to marry Lilo. Said Maria: "You tell Ornella next time you see her that you don't want to marry her, you want to marry Lilo." He sighed, shook his head, and said "Well. She won't be very happy."

I mean. The kid comes out with some gold. And then there's the puker, who's bubbly personality is the carbon copy of his mother. He's one of those babies that love being around people - which makes bedtime rather a bore. And let me tell you, his screams are high pitched and persistent. He doesn't give in easily. It's as if he's saying "WHAT THE HELL??? YOU'RE PUTTING ME TO BED WHEN WE HAVE COMPANY??? IS THIS A JOKE??? MUM?? IS THIS A JOKE, FOR REALS??" Alas Pukes, it's no joke.

Hmm. What else. We've seen some good movies - True Grit, for example. What's that? Didn't think i was the cowboy type, you say? OK, it's a western, fine. But it's a good one! I really had no idea what it was about, so maybe having no expectations helped. But i thought it was excellent. The young girl in it, i think her name is Hailee Steinfeld, she was amazing. She plays a girl who's father was killed by an outlaw - and now she wants him brought to justice. So she hires a washed up old Marshall (played by Jeff Bridges) to go out and find the killer, and bring him in. With her help, of course. Honestly, it was top notch performances by everyone - including Matt Damon, who plays a Texas ranger on a hunt of his own. Give it a chance people.

We also finally got around to watching The Social Network. That was great too actually, i can understand now why everyones been raving about it. Though i still find it weird that such a current issue has already been made into a movie.

And of course there's the Oscars. Two words for that: train. wreck. I mean, James Franco? What the hell? Anne Hathaway, to her credit, gave it a pretty good shot. I felt sorry for her actually. She talked without appearing to read from an autocue, which i thought was a positive start. And the girl can sing, I'll give her that. But that Franco kid, he really let her down. He looked grey and sweaty and drugged up, and totally disinterested in the whole thing. Neither of them should have been given the job. That's my two cents.

OH, and this book - Room, by Emma Donoghue. I literally couldn't put it down. Reckon i read it in 48 hours, if not less. READ IT PEOPLE! It's so good. It's narrated by a 5 year old boy called Jack. He's lived his whole life inside one, tiny room - never been outside, never known another life but the one inside those four walls. The reason for this is that his mother has been held captive for the last 7 years by her abductor - who is also Jack's father. It's sort of a Joseph Fritzl situation. I felt claustrophobic just reading it. What makes the book so poignant is the fact that it IS narrated by the child, who doesn't know any other life. His friends are the table, the chairs, the stove, the bed. The sight of any living thing - ant, spider - sends him into spasms of joy. And yet he's happy, and doesn't understand why his mother would ever want to leave what is essentially the only home he's ever known. Anyway, that's all I'm going to say. READ. IT.

I want to tell you about my hens weekend in the Hunter Valley, but i don't have any photo's yet, so that might have to wait. Otherwise, this has been my last week at work, yay, so it's been ridiculously busy. But as of today, Friday, I'm DONE for three and a half weeks, and i can't tell you how good that feels. It's been a frenzy of preparations for the wedding of course - we're only a week out, and I'm so excited about what's going to be, I'll call it now, an awesome party. And then, holidays! Woooooot! Vanuatu, for ten relaxing days. I can't wait.

But more than anything, I'm just so excited to be marrying my best friend in the whole world - its nice to know you're going to be spending your life with someone you actually have so much fun with, every day.

Cluck cluck

I'm referring, of course, to my hens night - 10 hours of madness and mayhem that proved something very important: getting older does not mean you lose the ability to dance all night long.




Hell. No.




But let's start at the very beginning (a very good place to start). I'm not one for blinking "Bride to Be" sashes or gaudy tiara's or penis straws - I'm a classy gal after all. So my evening was supposed to be a pleasant, sophisticated affair.




And i mean. It TOTALLY started out like that. My Hen Entourage and I met at my most favourite bar in Sydney, The Victoria Room, where I've been sipping delicious cocktails for many years. We had our own private (air conditioned, thank God) sitting room, where we drank champagne and indulged in a huge dinner, and chatted and laughed and lived, and all was right with the world. My mother was on fire - it's was an exciting night for her, being out and about in the CITY no less, in a trendy bar, drinking expensive champagne, catching a cab home....sheesh. Kid in a candy store stuff. But hey - you were NOT drunk, right Ma? *wink wink. nudge nudge* Anywho, the thing to remember is that she had a marvellous time, as did we all.




And then, the clock struck 11. Which is not an ominous number by any means. I mean its not midnight or anything. But by the time 11 rolls around, you can pretty much separate the stayers and the goers. You know who's gonna stick with you till the end, and who's gonna have to head off (bye Mum.). My core groupies and I, knew there was only one place that could satisfy a dance fever.





And that was the Retro.





Sure it's a dive, but OH the nights we've had there. It was fitting to go back for one last hurrah. (Last hurrah? Who am i kidding. Retro is for life, dude.) There's really a lot to love. For one, cheap drinks. Then, the music - 70s and 80s all night long upstairs, and awesome 90s and top 40 downstairs. Really, the choice is endless. Thirdly, what's not to like about disco balls, fluorescent lights and podiums?




So we get there, and of course its straight upstairs for some 80s magic. It was probably about midnight when we arrived, when the dancing fervor began. This fervor, my friends, did not end until 5 hours later when, weary and exhausted, we looked around and realised there was actually no one left except us. I'm pretty sure the DJ wasn't happy about it. ("I could be packing up to go home right now, but instead I'm here spinning tunes for a bunch of ungrateful GIRLS??? WHAT THE???")




Maybe it was the weather. It was the hottest night recorded in Sydney in i don't know how many years. I'm talking really steamy. The humidity was fierce. People go loopy in that kind of heat. We walked out of there at 5am and it was still 35 degrees. Or maybe it was the music. Tina Turner's Simply the Best sent my friend Lauren into spasms of joy - the girl was singing into a pretend microphone for godsake. And then of course, Thriller and Billie Jean. Dancing Queen. Run to Paradise. Summer of '69. I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles). Summer Rain. That was just in the first hour people! There's just something about singing at the top of your lungs with a bunch of friends on a podium that grabs a hold of you and doesn't let you go all night, you know? Can we really be blamed? Or maybe it was just the company. My friends are awesome, as are my cousins, and frankly, that's what's gonna make your night great. We were all just having a good time together - who wants to leave that?




Whatever it was, i can safely say I had an absolute blast. I can also safely say that Tina Turner will forever remind me of that night. Kama, Lauren and I (GENUINELY the last men standing), came back to my place afterwards in a state of near-collapse, desperate for eggs (which i did make, by the way, at 5.30 in the morning, in a vodka-induced stupor. What can I say, turning the stove on seemed like an awesome idea at the time.) And those eggs were the best I've ever tasted, let me tell you. Alas, this was closely followed by one of the WORST nights sleep I've ever had. (Not your fault, Kama, even though we shared the bed. You aren't to blame. Smirnoff ice double blacks, on the other hand, certainly played a part.)





Unfortunately, i had Jo's big camera that night (which i admit, i don't know how to use properly), so i didn't get the best pictures....but here's a teeny tiny selection. I know i haven't blogged regularly in ages, I've been super duper busy - the wedding is two weeks away now, so all down to the nitty gritty details. My best friend and maid of honour Leah arrived back in the country on Thursday night (she's been living in the UK the last 12 months, but flew in especially for the wedding), so now it really feels exciting! This weekend was spent in the Hunter Valley, for Part Two of my Hens celebrations - all organised by Leah - more fun, more madness, and i promise a blog to follow on that soon...hopefully...

Maria, Lauren, Kama and the other Maria.

Romina and I (and Bean the Second, techinically.)

Me and Vicks

Sylvana, Susie, Mel and Adriana

Maria, AKA 'The Instigator", and I

My mother. What can i say, we come from the same mould.

The one with all the books

I've actually read a bunch of great books lately. I've always been a big reader, but for 2011 i decided that i wasn't going to read anything i really didn't want to. What i mean is, if i start a book and it isn't doing it for me, I'm going to abandon it instead of force myself to kick on. Which hopefully means I'll only be reading really great stuff. Which, in hindsight, makes me wonder why i didn't start doing this years ago.









Anyway. Whatevs. Onto the books!









OK. Now i know everyone always has mixed feelings about books that would be classified as 'Young Adult'. It seems that if there are vampires or werewolves involved (Twilight anyone?), then the peeps are on board. If not, young adult fiction seems to be a bit taboo (unless you actually are a young adult. And by young adult i mean teenager.) But i honestly believe there's some really great stand alone, well written young adult titles out there that adults could get a lot out of. And Please Ignore Vera Dietz by A.S King is one of them. Yes, it's a coming of age novel. But it's a really, really good one.









Vera is in love with her best friend, Charlie. The only problem is, Charlie is dead. Worse - he died under some pretty dark circumstances. Worse again - he's haunting Vera. That's right. Haunting her. Because she's the only one out there who can clear his name. That's pretty much all I'm gonna say about the plot. But this novel is smart, funny and has a lot of heart. Vera is well rounded character - she's clever and likable, but she makes mistakes. If you're open to trying out some GOOD young adult fiction (cause there's a lot of crap out there), you should give this one a go.









On the other side of the spectrum is one of the most 'adult' books I've read in a long time. Australian novel The Slap, by Christos Tsiolkas is my best book of 2011 so far. I mean. It's only February. But still. A friend of mine passed it on to me, and I've passed it on to someone else, and they've passed it on to someone else again. I think this one's going to make the rounds at my office, for sure. The premise is pretty simple - a guy at a BBQ slaps a kid that isn't his. The event unleashes serious repercussions and differing opinions - the book is actually broken up into 8 parts, each told from the point of view of a character who was there. The interesting thing about it is that all of the characters come from completely different backgrounds, so you get diverse opinions - not just about the slap itself, but about life. Characters ranged from young, old, gay, straight, single, married and came from a variety of racial backgrounds. I thought it honestly covered the good, the bad and the ugly side of life - from relationships to marriage to kids to growing old - it's all there. Its a really great read - just be prepared for lots of swearing and sex. You'll find a lot to talk about!











After that hefty read, i needed something a bit...lighter. So i picked up Bad Marie, by Marcy Dermansky, and read it in two days. Marie really is bad. Deliciously so. An ex-con who actually enjoyed the lack of responsibility required in prison, Marie is released after 6 years on the inside, and heads straight to New York City. She becomes a live-in nanny, and promptly proceeds kidnap the child in her care. For good measure, she steals the husband too. What follows is quite the romp - implausible, sure, but great fun. And despite Marie's wickedness - i really liked her! I wanted things to work out! The whole kidnapping thing...bah. The kids real mother was a bitch anyway. I was rooting for Marie all the way - betcha you will too.











And my latest read? An oddball, but one i liked. Balthazar Jones and the Tower of London Zoo by Julia Stuart is one of those subtle books that makes a quiet impact. I wasn't sure i was going to like it at first - even the writing is oddball. But once i got used to that, i found myself looking for 5 minutes during the day to read some more. Of course, its the characters in this one that really make the difference. They were the types you really come to care about. As the title suggests, the book centres around Balthazar Jones, a beefeater at the Tower of London, and his wife. They once had a son, but now they do not, and that's all I'll say about that. There are an assortment of other characters that live within the walls of the Tower of London, and each of them have a story or a secret to tell. If you don't mind character-driven reads, this is a great one.





I must tell you about my hens night (the first one that is), but I'll save that for next time. Bizarrely, I'm more interested in watching Top Gear right now, so I'll leave you all to enjoy your Tuesday evenings.

A Farm Party

For Jack's birthday this year, Maria and I put our heads together and decided we'd do a themed party. Since the pest loves animals so much, we thought a farm party would be fun for a bunch of three year olds. And apart from being a thousand degrees out that day, it turned out a treat - the little mobile farm was a great success. The kids got to learn about all the animals, and were able to feed and pet them (under supervision, of course).









The lovely ladies who ran the whole thing were very patient - unlike me. The heat was driving me up the wall, and it was a MORNING party. So i admit, i may or may not have been slightly snappy. Possibly. So sue me! Everyones sweating and there are a million kids who want to pee and eat and pet the sheep and get in the pen and out of the pen and be read stories...bah. BAH! I just wanted to eat my egg roll in peace. It was nice to see Jack so excited though. Winner!

Zara was the most fearless of them all. Patting the sheep was not enough. She wanted to ride the damn thing.

The cake itself was awesome, made by Jack's equally awesome (and very handy in the kitchen) neighbour Jenna. Look! A farm cake! I think about what Maria and I would have accomplished if we'd been set the task of making this thing. In my vision, we are staring helplessly at both a bowl of green sludge and an empty bottle of champagne. We may or may not have been responsible for both. Basically, it's lucky we have Jenna to do the baking. (She even did the animals. I am beyond impressed. They look exactly like they're supposed to look! I can't even DRAW a cow, let alone make one out of....whatever the hell that stuff is.)

That little sign on the cake says "Jack's farm - Est. 2008". I mean. The girl thought of everything. By the way, have you noticed this new smile of Jack's? The bottom teeth seem to be a main feature. What's that about kid?

I will say this - his confidence, for a three year old, is pretty amazing. I know I'm biased. But really, it is. After he blew his candles out, he got up on that chair and actually said a speech. In front of a room full of people. "Thank you for coming to my party and for my presents, and thank you to mummy and daddy for giving me a party." THAT was the speech! WTF? What three year old does that?? I mean he had a bit of prodding, fair enough, but still. Even i was proud.

So, more birthday celebrations are over for another year. Hard to believe in a couple more years he'll be in school (HA - that'll be a rude shock to his system. Structure? Rules? What??) And now, I'm off to watch Bridezillas. Don't judge till you've seen it. Everyone loves a psycho-bride.

Hi 40 degree days

Sweet Bajesus its hot. REAL hot. Don't get me wrong - i love warm weather as much as the next person, but this freaking humidity is wearing everyone down. Ahhh the curse of the Sydney-sider - we love to complain. When it's raining we wonder where summer is, but when it's too hot we hate dealing with it.

So, best to look on the bright side - and that is going to the beach after work. LOVE! We've been a few times this week, and I'm loving it. Nothing more refreshing than washing the crap of the day away in the sea. Plus, the water's been really warm. Usually the ocean can be bracing, to say the least, but this week it's had that "just peed in" warm quality that i love.

The other great thing about this weather? Sydney looks great in it. The harbour is sparkling, the ferries are steaming, people are out and about at all hours...i love it. Here's a cracking example of how this fine city can look on a sunny day:

I mean really. Why would you want to live anywhere else? (Oh yeah, cause it costs a shitbomb to live here. Still,.Bright side, bright side....) Ah well, that's love for you - no matter the cost, you never want to leave. And i do have a passion for this city.

Since it's been so steamy out, you have to cool down by sticking by the water - the beach, the harbour...anywhere you might get a breeze. Nighttime is the worst. Our apartment has aircon but honestly, it doesn't feel like its working. Until you go outside and realise the temperature's doubled. Sweaty, sticky nights lose their allure after about ten minutes, let me tell you. Ain't nothing sexy about stinking the bed out. But I digress. So we go to the beach, and we take walks around the harbour, and life is pretty good!

In other news - the wedding is now 5 weeks away. Which means, people, the HONEYMOON is 5 weeks away. WOOT! I am so looking forward to all that time off work. (And getting married. Obviously I'm looking forward to that and everything.) (NO WORK NO WORK NO WORK!!)

Downside to the wedding coming up? Everyone wants my money. Final payments are due for everything, which means we're rapidly waving bye byes to our hard-earned cash. The things we do eh?

Hope everyone has an amazing weekend - hens night tomorrow for me, and i intend to be drowning in cocktails by 9pm. Wish me luck!

End of January?? What??

How is that possible? Too busy, that's the bloody problem, and this week was no exception. It was Jack's birthday on Wednesday, so we went over for dinner and cake and all that. His real birthday party isn't until this weekend, and it's featuring a special surprise from me and Maria. More on that next week! As for Wednesday, for an impromptu party there sure were plenty of kids in attendance. Christ. Girls, boys, babies - every age bracket was accounted for. There really was nowhere to hide. So i made the best of it and stuck with the ones i knew and loved.

Christian, Raffael and me

In fact, it wasn't just Jack's birthday - it was his cousin William's too. Which is why there were about a billion kids - double the festivities. William was turning two, so still slightly overwhelmed by it all. But turning three, Jack had a better idea of what birthdays are all about - presents. And lets be honest - the kid threw aside anything that wasn't a toy or DVD. Little shit.

Birthday cakes!

Happy birthday to me!

William cuts the cake with his mama

Kid heaven

By the time Friday rolled around, i was ready for a drink. Alas for me and everyone around me, because drink i did. A good friend from work was leaving (she's travelling the world for 6 months, lucky bugger), so we decided heading to the pub early was in order. First bottle of wine was consumed by 4.30 in the afternoon, and Lord knows that happened after that. I know i got home past midnight - which means we basically drank for a full working day. Which is a phenomenal effort, and i applaud it, and i was punished for it on Saturday BELIEVE ME. My body can no longer cope with all-night benders. Am i getting old??? How did i manage that sort of drinking TWICE every weekend a mere few years ago?? Vague snippets of the night are coming back to me as the days pass (like demanding someone go and get me a burger - and actually, i think someone did), which is always funny. Its like you're in a half-dream - did that really happen, or am i imagining it? Good times.

Me and Wing-Sze, world traveller extraordinaire, who i will MISS!!

George, me and WS - i can't believe our trio has been so rudely split. Bah. Bah!

On the other hand, waking up early the next day to meet Maria in Newtown and look for wedding favours was NOT a happy moment. Really. Was. Not.

I was parched, for starters, and no amount of water would quench my thirst. Second, it was like a hundred degrees outside, so all i did for three hours was sweat out everything I'd consumed the night before. Thirdly, we were supposed to meet for breakfast, but Maria was late, so i had to eat alone like a loser, AND, i really wanted greasy bacon and eggs for breakfast, but I've vowed off eating pork, so i had to have mushrooms instead. Not the fat factor i was after. And it was one of those situations where I'd asked for two menus because i thought there would be two of us. So the waiter brings two menus and two water glasses and two sets of cutlery. And then Maria doesn't show, which is OK, but to the waiter, it looked like I'd been totally ditched, probably by a guy. "My cousin's running really late..." i told him feebly when i went to pay. And he gives me this sympathetic look like "Yeah, sure. See it all the time. But OK, you're cousin's late, whatevs..."

To top it off, we ended up sitting for what felt like an eternity with this lady talking about wedding favours when all i wanted to do was go to the toilet. When i finally couldn't hold it any more, i asked whether there was one available even though i could see there wasn't. She said she had one out the back, but that it was a bit "rustic". HA! Rustic?? Rustic means CHARMING, lady! Not pitch-black, spider-infested, outback dunny with mouldy toilet paper and a yellow-stained floor. But i was busting so i had to go, i had to. And really, after that, all i wanted to do was go back home and go to bed. Thank goodness I actually found some favours i liked after all that, so it was kind of worth it, just.

By Sunday i was buggered, but it was a beautiful day and we were heading off for a BBQ with my cousins. They have three little kids who are a hoot, and we love seeing them, so it was a nice afternoon.

Raffael and Christian with their vegetable garden

Fish on the barbie for lunch, DELICIOUS.

Jo, Raffy and Christian reading books

Later that afternoon, Jo and my Dad were headed off to the cricket, so Mum and I decided to go to the movies to see Black Swan. Obviously it's been getting a lot of buzz, so we were interested to see whether it would live up to the hype.

Which it kind of did. I'm not sure what i expected from it in hindsight actually. It's hard to put it in a genre category, but i guess you could call it part thriller, part horror. Natalie Portman plays Nina, a ballerina who's waiting for her big moment - and it comes when she wins the lead in Swan Lake. Her nervous and unsure personality is evident from the start, but once the pressure of the role sets in, and we learn more about her home life, the cracks in her mental state begin to show. From there, the audience is left to guess what's real and what isn't. We see it all through Nina's eyes, and that's what i liked best about the movie - i felt like i understood her paranoia and delusions because i was seeing them for myself, i thought they were real too. When it turned out they weren't, i felt her confusion because it was also my own. I was definitely on the edge of my seat for the whole movie. On the other hand. It was so intense and confronting in its realism that I was almost uncomfortable watching it. And i am no prude by any means, but there were some scenes where i was like "Geez. That's...weird..." So I'm not sure its for everyone. From an artistic perspective, it's beautifully staged and shot. But it's very dark, and its MA rating is appropriate. I'm still feeling a little unnerved and disturbed by it, even a couple of days later.

Public holiday tomorrow, so no work for me! I'll keep you posted on how my Australia Day turns out - most likely i will sleep, eat, watch trash TV with the aircon on high, sleep, attend a BBQ, then sleep. Not too shabby if you ask me.

Misshapen halos and mischevious grins

My blog post title today comes from a poem about little boys, and pretty much sums up the pest perfectly. He is equal parts naughty and nice, sugar and spice, and that's just the way we like him.

I'm talking about Jack because today is his third birthday. There's something about that age, three. It's like you cross a magical threshold into big-boyhood. All little kids who turn three say they're now a big boy or girl, and yes, that's what Jack's telling anyone who'll listen at the moment. "I'm fwee. I'm a big boy now. I do poos in the toilet." Because when you're three, your biggest accomplishment probably IS doing a poo in the toilet. (Well done kid. Happy to see that life skill can finally be crossed off the list.)

Poo jokes aside, I'm astonished at how much he's changed this year. His talking was always good, but even I look up in surprise sometimes at the sentences that come out his mouth. I know I'm bias, but there's no denying it - the kid's smart. (What's that? He takes after me? Well. I didn't want to say anything...) His memory is second to none, he says words that I'm sure he's never heard before, and he is endearingly funny without knowing it. If you've had a bad day, go and spend an hour with Jack. I promise you'll be in stitches by the end - and you'll feel about a billion times better. Yep - Jack is my bad-day remedy, my go-to guy when things get a bit tough. He's pretty awesome like that.

Of course, the split personality of a two year old has meant that this has also been the year of the tantrum. So actually, you should call before you visit. Cause if the kid's in a bad mood, you may as well just stay home. I've seen some spectacular fits of hysteria in the last few months. If he hasn't slept and he's in a bad mood, it's a sight to behold. I should start selling tickets. It's the staying-power of the tears that never ceases to amaze me - there's actually no break in crying for like 30 minutes at a time. HOW is this possible?? More importantly, WHY is this possible?? Unlike the tickle me elmo, there seems to be no 'off' button - so when the tantrum cyclone hits, i tend to just run for the door. Somewhere else to be and all that.

The last 12 months have also revealed some of Jack's more specialised talents. Like singing. The kid loves to sing. Put him in front of a microphone (and trust me, we have), and its like he BECOMES a rock star. The creative genius simply cannot be contained. His favourite song right now is the Glee mash up of Confessions/It's My Life. I specifically mention the Glee thing because we HAVE in fact tried to play him the original Bon Jovi version of It's My Life, and he hates it. Can't stand to have it on for more than three seconds. After that, he claims his ears hurt, and we have to turn it off. This leads me to Jack's second specialised talent: lying.

The lies roll off his tongue like rain off a ducks back. Maria tries to tell us that lying is a sign of intelligence, a fact i believe I've mentioned here before. But lets not delude ourselves. Lying just means he's figured out how to get away with stuff. It's going to become a very useful tool at pre-school. I'm almost proud when i think of all the ways he's gonna dupe those other stupid kids *sniggers* Anyway, he's a liar, and Ive spend long minutes listening to stories about non-existent needles that non-existent ant doctors have given him, or about the dinner he supposedly ate. Or being told that he did not in fact make that mess, it was the other kid, whatshisname, he's the one who did it. When challenged, i actually heard him say in an agonised tone, "I told him not to do it." WHAT??? I had to laugh.

As i mentioned before - it's been a year of developing life skills. Pooing in the toilet was just one of several. My particular favourite? Negotiation. The kid should be working for the CIA. He'll negotiate the chocolate right out of your hand if your not careful. Before you know it, you're nodding your head saying "Mmm, yes, you want to watch Tom and Jerry another 50 times before bed...that sounds fair..." Like all the great orators in our family (me, Maria...me...), he can talk his way through and out of anything. It's not all roses though. There are some concepts he can't quite grasp. Like sharing. Or saying sorry. Or eating a full meal. There's plenty of room for improvement. Its lucky he's pretty sweet most of the time, so we can overlook these minor shortcomings...(that means we're turning a total blind eye).

Here's the part where i reflect: i can't believe the kids already three. I wish that time and age were slower, so he could stay little forever. Its sort of sad and not sad at the same time to see the baby disappear and the little boy emerge. Of course, our understanding of the time means we know that he's not going to stay a little boy forever either - one day he'll be a teenager (ugh), and then an adult. Which means, we better enjoy this while we can.

Happy birthday my boy. It's been fun terrorising you the last three years - don't think that'll stop any time soon. I love you xxx