The (second) most anticipated wedding of the year...

...the first, of course, being...my own. Which was equally fabulous. But enough about me. Unless you've been living under a rock the last couple of weeks you'd know that Prince William, the most eligible Prince of recent times, married a commoner on Friday. What? No! I meant Kate Middleton. Slip of the tongue. Anyway, no doubt Grandma is very proud.






Being the Royal enthusiasts that we are, Maria and I decided we simply had to host a party in honour of the happy couple. Lucky for us Aussies, the wedding was streamed live from London, beginning 8pm Oz-time - a very respectable hour indeed. Perfect for popping the champagne and getting our drinking game on. But more on that later.







As i said, Maria and I love all things royal, especially royal weddings. We watched the wedding of Princess Mary to Prince Frederick of Denmark live all those years ago. (Another nobody who bagged herself a Prince! What the!? Am i hanging out at the wrong bars?!)




(What's that? Jo? Jo who?)




Now i know there are many Australians out there who believe we should become a republic, and I'm going to be controversial here and say that i really don't care either way. I don't think our daily lives will be particularly affected, no matter what happens, so a part of me thinks if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Really, i just find the history, the pomp, the tradition, (the scandal), all very fascinating. As for the rest, I'm neither here nor there.





But back to our favourite couple, Wills and Kate. Ah, what a love story. He in all his Princely glory and she in all her nothingness - but what stylish nothingness! A word on this - I've heard a lot of people say she doesn't take enough risks in fashion, but I say she's all class. I've never seen her wear something she looks bad in, and people - sometimes less is more. It works. I'm glad she's not too eccentric in the way she dresses. She's just normal. And i especially love that she shops in high street stores like all the other plebs. Hopefully she doesn't forget her roots. (I know. Doubt it.)




Here they are, looking radiant, despite William's obviously deteriorating hair follicles. Another controversial observation from me - Wills was in his prime maybe 5 years ago. But those days are over. The truth of the matter is, that hair ain't never growing back. We hoped he'd be Diana incarnate, but alas, Charles' genes have dominated. And won. I'd take Harry any day of the week. I know, he looked very handsome in the whole red suit get-up, but the fact remains - he looked better with the hat on. That is, when you couldn't really see his face. ANYWAY, i digress again! The happy couple:











Wait, one more point on Wills - he has decided he is above wearing a wedding ring. FYI Will, the entire world knows your married now, so who ya trying to fool huh? I read its because he doesn't like jewelery, and i suppose being a Prince he can do whatever he wants, but still. He could have given it a go at least.






And here are your hosts for the evening! Meanwhile, check out those blinds in the background. See those little pieces of paper pegged on there? Oh yeah. Kate and Wills pics. Courtesy of me, and the colour printer at work. (A flourishing career in party planning awaits. Am i right?)

And here's a sample of what we served. Homemade tea cake (Maria's baby, not mine), and scones presided over by HRH herself.

But don't let the scones deceive you into thinking this was a posh affair. It started off OK - people milling about being polite and so on...

...but then we passed around the rules to our Royal Wedding Drinking Game, and. Well. You can only guess how things went. The rules included, but were certainly not limited to, the following:

• Take a drink if the Queen is on screen




• If the commentator mentions Diana, take three drinks




• Any time parallels are drawn to the Diana/Charles wedding, take three drinks




• Last person to shout 'Candle in the Wind' if Elton John is on screen must take 5 drinks

Etc etc. Needless to say, we all became highly opinionated on the proceedings, but there was one thing we all agreed on - those reindeer antlers worn by Beatrice were completely and utterly hideous. WHAT, I ask you, was she THINKING?? The rest of the outfit was...OK. I mean it wasn't great, mind you. But those antlers. Honestly. And her sister Eugenie - can i ask who allowed her to leave the house in that horrible blue thing? The two sisters took out worst-dressed for me. Google their outfits. You'll see what i mean.





Also, I'm not sure if this is the fashion in the UK, but it seemed a lot of ladies worse their fascinaters right on their foreheads. Which is just weird. Posh Spice, for example - yes, she'll always be Posh Spice to me - wore some sort of mini-bowler-hat creation, and it sat practically between her eyeballs. I know she's pregnant with her gazillianth child, but that's no excuse.

So the champagne flowed, and we cooed over Wills and Kate and their little whispers and smiles and general air of happiness, and how pretty London looked all dressed up with the flags and the bunting, and how she said "Oh wow" when she first walked out on the balcony, and how they kissed twice, and how the Queen wasted no time in ushering everyone back inside after two seconds because she's a cranky old nanna...I mean see? See how happy everyone looks? (Except Turnsie, who never looks happy.) (This is his "Lord of the Manor" face by the way.) (???)

To really get the party going, we took photos of Turnsies ears. Here's one of them, in case you felt like checking out something really disgusting today.

What i'm trying to say is, the party was a hit (no surprises there because we're the hostesses with the mostesses. By that, i mean we keep champagne popped and flowing at all times.) I wish i could have been in London for the occasion, but alas, it wasn't to be. Hopefully Harry will come through for me in the next few years (little ginger scoundral that he is.)

All thats left to say is...God Bless America!

I mean.

God Bless the Queen! Yeah. That's the right one...